today on the plane

Today on the plane trip,  a very sleepy Jacob rested his head on my shoulder... In that minute  all I could see was my sweet little boy...I don't care if he is 19... He is my little boy.. and all I could think was he is going to be in so much pain ... he is SO brave... his nerves are getting to him, he hasn't been keeping his food down, but he doesn't want to talk about it.
   Since we checked into the hotel room he has been keeping himself busy with video games and things on you tube making him laugh... He has a great laugh... silly kid... He is hoping it will snow because he wants to hit me with a snowball... I don't that will happen before the surgery. The funny guy told me to... get this.. and hand me that.. then laughed saying he was just practicing for after the surgery.
    I can't wait for him to feel better... He doesn't remember what it feels like to be able to run without being exhausted... I was thinking about how when they first put him on beta blockers and his comment was" wow.. I can't feel my heart beating"... he thought heart palpitations were normal.  I hope and pray this surgery gives him a better quality of life..

   Our appointment for pre-op is at 10:30 tomorrow. They told us to expect it to be about five hours. They will  do a physical, chest x-ray, EKG, and lab studies then we will meet with anesthesia, nurse & doctor.